Our name is part of our identity. It tells other people who we are, and who we identify as. It’s so natural to most people to be able to say their name, but for me, I’m 90% of the time unable to pronounce my full name fluently and fully.
Not being able to say your name is frustrating; mine is Jordan, as you know. I’ll break it apart at Jor-dan while having more trouble with the ‘N’ sound. Most people will mistake my name as George because it’s what it sounds most like. However, with not being able to tell other people your first name, it’s hard because people question you. Like, is that his name? Does he not know what his name is?
I’ve encountered a lot of accepting people with my speech difficulties. With me having that given trouble, some people honestly don’t care. They allow me to take my time. However, at times, it can be me not having enough patience with myself; this is where I remind myself; I’m the only person who has to have patience with me. Nobody else matters. I have to accept myself for who I am, for whoever I am that day, and I need to embrace that person.
I joke with my mom about giving me a two-syllable name because it’s always been a bit difficult for me, but it is my name and who I identify with.
I one time posted to my Instagram story about how I said my name fluently for the first time in months. I got loaded with love messages from my followers- and it honestly meant the world to me. Because other people don’t understand this, but you guys do. My followers understand my struggles, and I didn’t have people like that who understood that prior.
I know there will be additional challenges along the way, as I age and get introduced to new life situations, ones that I’m not prepared for, which is where my team is there for me to support me. I have my own concerns that people view this as a lack of independence, because I have troubles with words. When I value my independence and freedom, and frankly, I know I don’t need to rely on anybody. I don’t want to. That’s not part of my values, and that’s what makes me Jordan.
I know every step in my life will require a new version of me, and I know there might need to be modifications along the way. I just know myself, and I’m adaptable. And if I need help, I ask for it without hesitation. I’m not afraid of growth.