The Day I Got Lost Because I Couldn’t Say My Name: Apraxia & Parenting

Clinging to My Mom’s Leg

When I was in kindergarten, I remember clinging tightly to my mom’s leg because I was so scared. As a nonspeaking child, she was the only person who could understand my gestures. My classmates didn’t understand me, and I often felt isolated. But one day, that isolation hit me harder than ever.

Sitting Outside the SLP’s Room

My kindergarten SLP wouldn’t let me into her room; instead, I had to sit outside her door. The isolation deepened. One day, overwhelmed by emotions, I got lost on my way back to my classroom. When others approached me to help, I couldn’t say my name. I tried so hard—I stomped my foot, groped for words, and eventually shut down. It was too much- being trapped in my own mind from such an early age was one of the most isolating experiences of my life.

 When My Brother Spoke My Name

Eventually, someone found my brother and asked if he knew who I was. He said, “Oh, his name is Jordan. He’s my brother.”

In that moment, I remember thinking about him—why was he able to say my name when I couldn’t? It didn’t feel fair. It wasn’t fair.

My Mom’s Fear and Determination

That experience scared my mom deeply. For years afterward, she wrote my name and her phone number on the inside of my clothes and anywhere else she could. At first, I thought she did it to avoid mixing up my clothes with my siblings’. But now I understand—she wanted to make sure that if I ever got lost again, someone would know who I was and how to find her. She put a piece of paper in my pocket of my jeans every morning with her number on it; because her worst fear came true.

Turning Isolation Into Purpose

Because of these experiences—and not despite them—my mission is to ensure that no child has to go through what I did. If they do, I want to empower them and their families to navigate it.

Attached to this post is information about The Apraxia Foundation’s Identification Card—a tool designed to help children who may not be able to speak their name or ask for help. You can find it here.

To all parents, please never blame yourselves if this happens to your child. There’s no rulebook for this, and you are doing the best you can. We are so proud of you.